Marriage Therapy

Couples Therapy: Nurturing a Deeper Connection*
On many days, it is just plain difficult to experience fulfilling daily life with another person, learning to live in a shared and connected manner while at the same time remaining in good contact with yourself as an individual. We often forget that those we do "coupling" with or "family" with, are our daily sojourners in this pilgrimage of life.  Their reflection back to us about who we are can be valued as "data" in the journey toward greater self-discovery, providing an experience of "thriving" in the key relationships of our lives.


My approach to couples therapy integrates a variety of clinical techniques and currently researched psychological theories while intuitively drawing upon that which will create a deepened connection for the couple.  Believing that "good coupling" is the synthesis of a solid friendship, a mutually satisfying "lover" relationship  (if both people in the couple desire that) and a daily working "team" partnership focuses a goal for our work together.  Bringing attention to "the functioning of the whole", cognitive/behavioural theory is combined with gestalt theory/therapy techniques and systems theory to facilitate movement forward with an awareness to the interruptive habitual patterns.  Couples will learn a skill-set to help them both unblock the energies which create the stuck places between them and learn how to not feed reactivity and inertia and instead foster intimacy, meaningful contact and shared connection.


While in Couples Therapy with me, I will teach a skill-set to help you learn how to:

- Recognize the "core wounds" that all couples get entangled in and discover what you are really trying to say to each other behind the armoured "mask of defensiveness"
- Explore the vulnerable feelings and authentic needs underneath your destructive behaviours
- Deepen both emotional and physical intimacy
- Repair and forgive old ruptures, including unresolved hurts, disappointments and injuries
- Discover the emotional connection that creates greater bonding and can keep your love alive so your relationship becomes the safe harbor it was meant to be
- Affirm strengths in your relationship
- Address negative interaction patterns in both "self" and "other", understanding "the dual task of relatedness"
- Recognize underlying reasons for your conflicts
- Improve your communication through a specifically researched skill-set


*Couples therapy includes marital therapy and psychotherapy for any two persons who define themselves as a "couple".


Coupling Trees photo by Carol Felicity Critchlow